Stress less
Is your relationship full of stress?
by: Jane Saeman
We all experience relationship stress from time to time. It’s important to remember that this type of conflict has been shown to have a clear negative impact on health. The key is find positive ways to deal with it.

Stress is one of the biggest relationship killers. We all experience stress in our daily lives, but when it starts to become the focus of our relationship then it can be very harmful. Many relationships end due to stress related things. Money is a good example. People stress over money which leads to fighting and eventually it can tear up a relationship. The best way to deal with stress in a relationship is to confront it head on. Do not let stress take control of your relationship. You will know when stress is becoming a problem. Instead of letting it take over, you take control over it. There are some easy steps you can take to work through stress factors in your relationship.

● The first thing you have to do is identify the stress. Figure out what is causing the stress and why it is happening. You have to understand the cause so you can get the root of the problem and fix it.

● Next you should talk with your partner. Let them know the stress is getting to be a problem. Ask them their opinions on it. Ask what they think you should do. Try to find a solution, a good way to deal with the stress. Also be aware of any behaviors that may be adding to the stress. Try to work through these. Come to an agreement to stop doing things that cause the stress.

● Now you have to be mindful of the things you talked about. Reducing the stress is something that will take work. You will have to make a conscious effort to avoid stress. Also do not let stress go too long without dealing with it. You may end up feeling like you are always battling stress, but that is how it works. Once you start to identify and reduce the triggers that cause stress, though, you will have less stress and an easier time dealing with it.

● Something you can also try to de-stress is to use methods like massage or even therapy to help reduce stress and learn how to deal with it. You can try these things as a couple, which can bring an additional bonus of bringing you closer together.

It is important to remember that stress in a relationship is natural. You will always be confronted with stress of some kind of conflict. It is how you deal with it that is the most important. You have to be able to control the stress and not let it control you. By letting stress get out of hand you are going to start losing your relationship. Stress can be incredibly damaging but it doesn't have to be. If your relationship is full of stress then you know what you have to do. It is all in your hands. You have to reduce the stress so it does not take over your relationship and start causing harm.

Good communication can prevent stress at home


When it comes to relationships, there are many ways to improve your communication skills in order to create more positive outcomes. The Web site www.stress.about.com offers the following tips to better communication:

Stay focused: Sometimes it’s tempting to bring up past seemingly related conflicts when dealing with current ones. Stay focused on the present, your feelings, understanding one another and finding a solution.

Listen carefully: People often think they’re listening, but are really thinking about what they’re going to say next when the other person stops talking. While it might be difficult, try really listening to what your partner is saying.

Own what’s yours: Realize that personal responsibility is a strength, not a weakness, and admit when you’re wrong.

Use “I” messages: Rather than saying things like, “You really messed up here,” begin statements with “I”, and make them about yourself and your feelings, like, “I feel frustrated when this happens.”

Don’t give up: While taking a break from the discussion is sometimes a good idea, always come back to it. If you both approach the situation with a constructive attitude, mutual respect, and a willingness to see the other’s point of view or at least find a solution, you can make progress toward the goal of a resolution to the conflict. Unless it’s time to give up on the relationship, don’t give up on communication.

Source: http://www.stress.about.com.

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